How the Coalition Acknowledged the Second Anniversary
of Being Awarded the Nobel Prize
© 2009 Brad Kempo B.A. LL.B.
Barrister & Solicitor
It was one of the extraordinary high points in the coalition’s history – being awarded the most prestigious honor in modern times. Every year the partners celebrate and generate initiatives to remind Chinada malfeasant they are united and committed to containing and neutralizing everything they stand for.
The coalition generated two initiatives to celebrate it being awarded the Nobel. The first was delivered through the NBC News portal and as is the case with all diplomacy, the lexicon was employed. In this instance, during the correspondent’s monologue a staffer behind her executed a coalition identifying triple play: an embellished combination double-handed 60 Minutes Maneuver, a double-handed Diaz Maneuver and a Latifah Maneuver:
View video [@ 1:32]
The second was embedded in the introduction to and in the ‘Letterman’ Top Ten List. Dave intro-ed the famous segment with a Clooney Maneuver. That was followed by Number Five referring to what is documented in Retrospective on Coalition Appointments, Awards, Accolades and Acknowledgments. And Number Three articulates how long the partnership will be dedicating to ensure the Custodian Chief Executive exercises his political responsibilities.
5. You’re up against Tina Fey – she wins everything, people.
3. Devoted you life to creating a sushi that will still allow Jeremy Piven to act
In addition, Number Four contains a compensation ratifier and Number Two threatens the death penalty by way of lethal injection.
On the official anniversary, October 12th, ‘Colbert Report’ host Stephen Colbert employed a combination ‘we’re gonna f _ _ k you up real good’ Powell Maneuver and a Dogville reference in the context of a joke about the awarding of the Nobel Prize.
[Nobel announcement clip] They gave Barack Obama the Peace Prize. [...] Now I always thought the Swedes gave out Nobel prizes. It turns out that's only for the important ones: [pinky finger] literature, chemistry [ring finger], [3:11: middle finger] dog whispering. [audience laughter]
And Jon Stewart and ‘The Daily Show’ followed suit the following day with:
As you have probably heard, to the surprise of pretty much everyone, our President will be receiving the Nobel Peace Prize. [audience applause] It even caught the Commander in Cool off guard. [...] [clip of President's acceptance speech]
[impersonating the President] [protracted Clash of Civ. M.] Normally, a flock of bluebirds fly through my window, and gently lifts my sheets and a bear cub fetches my slippers and Bambi briefs me on troop movements in Afghanistan. Being President is awesome. [end]
[clip re: Malia on Bo's birthday – Dogville theme; Sasha on three day weekend – coalition identifier]
[1:15] And then Michelle [said] "it's going to be 85 and sunny today" [audience laughter]
[...]
[clips of television commentators criticizing award because President didn't earn it]
Yea, Yassir Arafat won a Nobel Peace Prize for shaking hands with Jewish guy. [audience laughter] If that's the case on Christmas Eve the owner of Shun-Lee's Chinese restaurant deserves like 50 of them [graphic: Chinese man with yellow medals and red straps] Boom!!! [X2]
My people enjoy Chinese food. [audience laughter] We love flat noodles.
But it wasn't just conservative pundits who were opposed to this choice. [news clip: Taliban suggesting the award should be for violence instead]
Yea, well Obama thinks you should get the Nobel Prize for being jerks. [audience laughter] In Obama's defense he didn't have a lot of time to come up with a good comeback.
So there seems to be a general consensus amongst the President's mortal enemies, and the Taliban, that he hasn't done enough to deserve this award. Time to prove 'em wrong. Mr. President you've just gotten the Nobel Peace Prize: what game-changing, peace-loving move will you make just ninety minutes after finding out the news to show that they gave the Peace Prize to the right man?
[news clip] “NASA literally bombed the moon.”
[audience laughter & applause]
